There is a Monster Under my Bed!

Sarah Harvey (Teacher at Trinityhouse Pre-Primary Little Falls) • June 24, 2019

Child sleeping with a monster under the bed

It is normal for children to be afraid of the dark at some stage or another. Preschoolers aren’t always able to distinguish between reality and fantasy. Couple this with very active imaginations and it becomes easy for them to believe monsters are under the bed or in the cupboards, waiting to pounce once the lights go out.

“There are also fewer distractions to keep a child’s mind occupied at night,” says Dobbins, who is also an assistant professor of paediatrics and child psychiatry at Southern Illinois University. “So instead, his imagination runs wild, and as a result, a child who seems well adjusted during the day may be more vulnerable at night.” The idea that monsters come out at night and prey on little children dates to century old variants of the boogeyman.

The fear of monsters

The fear of monsters has existed for centuries, in the earliest form as the “boogeyman”, a mythical creature which originated simply as a behaviour deterrent for children. – “if you don’t go to bed on time the boogeyman will get you.

Today, the fear of monsters is still an extremely relevant concept throughout society. Ideas around the boogeyman have manifested with the introduction of modern day influences such as tv and popular culture.

Popular culture

When it comes to fear of the dark, television is one of the biggest culprits. Often parents don’t realise how negatively T.V. can affect their children. Gaming is probably the second biggest culprit. Both activities are extremely stimulating and may contain inappropriate content for little children.

A lot of parents don’t limit what their children watch on T.V., or even know what games they are playing on their tablets or gaming devices. The images can be menacing and trigger already active imaginations, stirring up all sorts of ideas that can come back to haunt a child who is lying alone in the dark.

Over protective or an overly anxious parent can also contribute to a child feeling scared or anxious at night time. If not addressed, a child’s fear of the dark may continue to disturb their night time routine.

HOW TO HELP:

Identify the fear
Try and identify the fear by listening to your child. Encourage your child to tell you what makes him or her scared at bedtime. Don't belittle or trivialise your child's fears, they are very real to them.

Empower your child
Allow your child to talk about his or her bedtime fears and experiences during the day. Try and find ways to deal with these fears, or cope with them that may help your child feel less frightened at night. Empower your child to deal with a fear of the dark by asking him or her if she wants dad to check on her at night. Let the child decide on the timeframe; every 5, 10 or 15 minutes.

Keep bedtime routine comforting
Half an hour to an hour before bedtime, don't allow any TV, gaming, potentially scary stories or activities that will over stimulate your child. Rather do something relaxing, like spending some one-on-one time with your child.
Use nightlights and security objects
To create a sense of security, use a night light or a fluffy toy/blanket that your child can snuggle with.

Monsters don’t exist
Don’t tell your child you will scare the monster away, as this is buying into the believe monsters are real. Gently but firmly remind your child monsters do not exist.

Be mindful of other stress factors
Find out if their fear of the dark comes from other worries. For example, some children may be afraid of their parents separating or dying, and this anxiety gets worse when they are alone in the dark. Other stressful issues like the birth of a sibling, death of a pet, moving house or divorce can appear at night as a fear of the dark. If this is the case, Play Therapy may be the best solution.

Professional help
If your child’s fear interferes with his daily functioning and well being professional help may be the best option. They can help you and your child to learn coping strategies to deal with the anxiety.

Always be supportive , encourage communication, take their fears seriously and let them confront their fears at their own pace.

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Be mindful of mental health: building wellness, resilience, action and purpose in our families

By Laura Barrett • October 10, 2025

By Laura Barrett, Intern Counselling Psychologist at Trinityhouse Glenvista Each year on 10 October , the world pauses to recognise World Mental Health Day, a reminder that mental well-being is not just an individual concern, but a shared responsibility among families, schools, and communities. As an Educational Psychologist working closely with children and families, I have seen first-hand how early conversations about mental health can change the course of a young person’s life. When emotional well-being is acknowledged and nurtured from a young age, children are better equipped to handle life’s challenges with confidence and resilience. Why conversations about mental health matter? Mental health is not a “grown-up” topic, it’s a human one. If children are not taught about emotions and coping mechanisms early on, they may grow into adults who struggle to manage stress, relationships, or change. Talking openly about feelings, naming emotions, and learning healthy coping strategies are all part of developing emotional literacy. These are the tools that help children and adults stay grounded through the ups and downs of life. At Trinityhouse, together with the world earlier this year, we explored the WRAP framework: Wellness, Resilience, Action and Purpose, a simple yet powerful approach to supporting children’s mental well-being. Each pillar plays a role in creating emotional stability and balance, not only for children but also for the families guiding them. Wellness begins with the basics. Adequate sleep, good nutrition, hydration, and rest may sound simple, but they lay the foundation for emotional regulation. A well-rested, nourished child is far more likely to cope effectively with daily stressors. Being mindful of mental health also involves small, practical steps like taking a few deep breaths before a stressful test or stretching during homework breaks. For adults, this might mean pausing for a cup of tea, taking a short walk, or simply naming what you’re feeling in the moment. Labelling emotions (“I feel anxious about this meeting”) helps calm the mind and re-engage rational thinking. Resilience isn’t about “always being strong.” It’s about learning to recover and grow after setbacks. Parents and teachers can nurture resilience by giving children space to express their struggles without judgement, then helping them explore possible solutions. When a child faces disappointment, a poor test result or a conflict with a friend, remind them of times they’ve overcome challenges before. Ask: “What helped you last time?” This reflective process empowers children to see themselves as capable problem-solvers, rather than passive victims of circumstance. Positive mental health requires active engagement, not just awareness. For families, this can mean creating calm, structured environments where children feel safe and heard. The Positive Parenting framework offers five helpful practices to support this: Empathy : Validate your child’s emotions instead of dismissing them. “I can see you’re upset about your toy” goes further than “Don’t cry, it’s not a big deal.” Positive Reinforcement : Celebrate effort and progress, no matter how small. A star chart or extra family time can be simple yet powerful motivators. Consistent Boundaries : Predictable routines and clear consequences make children feel secure. Boundaries should be calm, firm, and fair. Open Communication : Create family moments for honest sharing. Ask, “What was the best part of your day?” and really listen to the answer. Co-regulation : Young children often mirror their parents’ emotions. When you model calmness through deep breathing or gentle reassurance you teach them to regulate their own feelings. A sense of purpose is vital for both adults and children. It gives meaning to our actions and connects us to something larger than ourselves. Encourage children to explore hobbies and interests that bring them joy and fulfilment, whether it’s art, sport, volunteering, or spending time outdoors. These pursuits help build identity, confidence, and belonging. For parents, purpose can come from nurturing both their children’s and their own mental health. The saying “You cannot pour from an empty cup” is particularly true here. When parents take care of themselves, physically, mentally, and emotionally, they model balance and self-respect for their children. Recognising when a child is struggling Even with the best support, children can experience emotional challenges. Warning signs may include withdrawal from friends, sudden changes in sleep or appetite, irritability, or declining motivation. These can indicate stress, anxiety, or burnout. If you notice these signs, open a gentle conversation: “I’ve noticed you haven’t seemed yourself lately. Would you like to talk about it?” Sometimes, simply being heard is the first step toward healing. Continuing the conversation The most inspiring shift in recent years is how openly young people now speak about mental health. Many no longer see anxiety, sadness, or stress as weaknesses but as part of the human experience. This honesty offers hope for a more empathetic, emotionally literate generation. On this World Mental Health Day , let’s extend that conversation beyond schools and into our homes. Let’s practise a WRAP culture together by building Wellness, Resilience, Action and Purpose not only in our children’s lives but in our own. At Trinityhouse , we believe education extends beyond academics, it’s about nurturing the heart and mind. By fostering open dialogue, emotional awareness, and resilience, we aim to create an environment where every child feels seen, supported, and empowered to thrive. When families make mental health a daily priority, we don’t just raise stronger children, we raise a kinder, calmer and more connected generation.

Helping your child make smart subject choices: a guide for South African parents

September 10, 2025

One of the most significant academic decisions your child will make in their school career is which subjects to select. For many South African families, it can feel like a daunting task filled with pressure, uncertainty, and long-term consequences. But with the right support, tools, and guidance, parents can help their children make well-informed decisions that set them up for future success, both academically and professionally. The foundation of good subject choices lies in understanding your child’s academic ability and current performance. Subjects like Mathematics, Physical Sciences, and Accounting require solid results in Grade 9 and a strong grasp of key concepts. Similarly, subjects like Engineering Graphics & Design (EGD) or Visual Arts cater to students with practical and creative aptitudes. Consider your child’s learning style: do they prefer theory, or do they thrive with hands-on learning? Although, it is normal to want what’s best for your child’s future, you should not force them to live up to your ideal of success. Rather initiate conversations about possible careers or areas of interest and explore how different subjects align with those pathways. Platforms like YENZA Careers are incredibly helpful in this regard. YENZA uses psychometric assessments to offer realistic subject recommendations based on your child’s strengths, interests, and potential career matches, and it gives parents access to the results too. “Choosing the right subjects is a balance of academic ability, interest, and long-term thinking,” says Sumari Purdon , Head of Academics for Trinityhouse Schools. “We encourage families to use this opportunity to start meaningful conversations about the future, with support from tools like YENZA and input from educators who know the student well.”