Screen Busters

ADvTECH Group • January 5, 2022

It’s easy to allow kids to stay on a screen all day because you are busy, because they are bored, and because it’s just less stressful that way, but here’s information that should make you rethink screen time for your kids.

Two children are laying on a bed looking at a laptop computer.

“Screen time” gets a terrible rap. You’re supposed to hate it, and pretend your child has very little of it, even as you return from your own eight-hours-at-the-computer-screen job, hoping to spend the evening catching an episode of your latest Netflix addiction, order Uber eats for dinner and FaceTime your sister in Australia.

So let’s not start another piece of parenting advice with a litany of woes. Actually, the internet is an amazing receptacle of all the knowledge human beings have ever gathered, a minor miracle, which you can access via a screen small enough to fit in your pocket. Most of us use screens in our work, definitely for entertainment, and as much as social media can be dangerous or nasty, it can also provide a space of safety, connection and belonging to those who feel on the margins in some way including our children.

What’s more, many of us only survived the pandemic because we were able to work and be schooled from home. Lastly, living a screen-free, internet-less life is just unrealistic in a world that is moving online at a pace that will still transform our daily lives even in our (middle-aged) lifetimes. However. There are undoubtedly dangers to be aware of as we migrate, via augmented reality, towards a metaverse in which our screenagers’ online existence is as “real” as the physical world around us. Broadly, there are physical and psychological hazards to screens. Because they are more easily

quantifiable, let’s start with the physical dangers.

Physical effects of screen time

Focusing for a long time on a small screen can damage your eyes, and ways to mitigate against that includes getting your eyes tested, coating spectacles with anti-reflective coating, and adjusting your computer’s settings to reduce blue light, contrast, font smoothing and flicker. You can download blue light filter and eye protection software, for instance from https://iristech.co/.

Looking at screens from incorrect angles can cause bad posture and headaches. And it stands to reason that the longer you are sitting at a screen, the less physical exercise you are getting, which increases the risks of obesity and other negative effects of sedentary lifestyles. The answer here is obvious: limit screen time, and balance screen exposure with real-world activities. Sleep quality is affected by screen exposure, too, so insist your child put that device down half an hour before bedtime.

A word on addiction

Before we can discuss psychological hazards of screen time, let’s discuss what addiction is. So-called “screen addiction” has not been recognised as an official disorder by any official psychological or health body. Excessive internet use is not considered a disorder by the World Health Organisation and you won’t find it listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM-V) or the International Classification of Diseases (IDC10).

Still, hallmarks of addiction are similar, nevermind your chosen poison. Dr Aric Sigman names the problem “children engaging in a variety of screen activities in a dependent, problematic manner” in the Journal of the International Child Psychology Association. He lists these eight characteristics of problematic, dependent screen use:

Preoccupation
Withdrawal symptoms
Increasing tolerance
Failure to reduce or stop screen activities
Loss of outside interests
Continuation despite negative consequences
Lying about extent of use
Use to escape adverse moods

You know your child (and yourself!). If this list seems eerily familiar, you’ve got a problem.

Psychological factors

The longer you spend online, whether it’s gaming, watching YouTube videos, using porn, or posting to and consuming social media, the fewer human beings you are interacting with in person. That equates to a lonely existence, and loneliness causes stress hormone cortisol to rise. So, your teen’s social skills are dulled (nobody is born with a fully functional set of these either; those skills are sharpened in real-world interactions with other people). Soon enough, a vicious cycle of frustration, isolation and depression can form. There is already a demonstrated correlation between internet overuse and substance abuse. Now throw unparalleled levels of insights into the private world of others into this mix, and a sad and mad teenager may not be able to cope.

“Social media allows insights into other people’s worlds and invites comparisons and insecurity,” says Pam Tudin, co-owner and creator of Klikd.co.za, a website and app that helps parents and teenagers navigate social media. So while it may be great that your teen can hang around in obscure corners of the internet meeting like-minded people with an equal passion for *insert super-niched interest here*, but there will also be SnapChats or TikTok videos or Instagram posts that document parties or friendships or in-jokes from which they are excluded.

“Know your child,” advises Pam. “Anxiety sufferers will be prone to online comparison, or need more online validation; an ADHD child may be more inclined to be impulsive. Be alive to your child’s disposition” so that you can react and look after them appropriately.

The teen years are a time for flexing the muscles of independence, and your child may object to your attempts to monitor their online behaviour. Partly this may be because they themselves are not yet aware of exactly what dangers can lurk online.

Consider downloading the Klikd app for them (it costs R450). It’s a multi-module app by teens for teens that deals with subjects such as phone addiction, cyberbullying, managing tricky people online, dealing with scammers, simulates online chats, online reputation and more. Tweens and teens aged between 10 and 15 complete 14 modules of the Klikdapp in their own time over a year or in a class, and they receive their “social media license” at the end of it.

“Contract with them that you will check their phone,” says Klikd’s Pam Tudin. You can safely rebut their demands for “privacy”, she says, by delineating what is private and what is not. “A journal or a voice call or an in-person visit is private, but an online forum is by definition not private, so their demands for a right to privacy on their phones is an oxymoron.” In that sense, you, reading their phone, are a concrete representation of the abstract, nameless and faceless individuals who consume your child’s online content or interact with them digitally.

“Get to a place where you can have less frequency and more trust in monitoring them online,” says Pam, “in that they demonstrate repeated, predictable behaviour in terms of how they show up online.” Managing screen time and online behaviour:

Balance, balance, balance: Allow your teen say an hour of screen time, but then expect that they spend an hour in the real world, doing a chore, exercise, seeing a friend or cooking a meal.

Who’s the parent? You are: Just as you may set a curfew or expect your children to contribute in some ways to the running of the household, so you are also allowed to set limits and have expectations in terms of online behaviour.

To prevent unhealthy late-night web surfing, it is a good idea to take devices away from bedrooms at bedtime and charge them overnight in the lounge or your bedroom.

Download an app such as the Google Family Link (or similar) that allows your teenagers’ linked accounts to be monitored for graphic content, total screen time, and that sets predetermined “online” hours (such as 6am to 8pm). Understand, however, that “net nannies” are not failsafe and that a determined enough user will figure a way around their restrictions.

For general safety in the real world, enable location sharing on your child’s phone or tablet so that you can track their whereabouts and vice versa. Google Family Link offers this, but many other apps such as Life360 do too.

Practise what you preach: If it annoys you to be speaking to your child almost exclusively “in profile”, with their nose buried in their phone, make sure you also put your device away when you’re with them. Modelling good manners is crucial for getting good behaviour back.

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Be mindful of mental health: building wellness, resilience, action and purpose in our families

By Laura Barrett • October 10, 2025

By Laura Barrett, Intern Counselling Psychologist at Trinityhouse Glenvista Each year on 10 October , the world pauses to recognise World Mental Health Day, a reminder that mental well-being is not just an individual concern, but a shared responsibility among families, schools, and communities. As an Educational Psychologist working closely with children and families, I have seen first-hand how early conversations about mental health can change the course of a young person’s life. When emotional well-being is acknowledged and nurtured from a young age, children are better equipped to handle life’s challenges with confidence and resilience. Why conversations about mental health matter? Mental health is not a “grown-up” topic, it’s a human one. If children are not taught about emotions and coping mechanisms early on, they may grow into adults who struggle to manage stress, relationships, or change. Talking openly about feelings, naming emotions, and learning healthy coping strategies are all part of developing emotional literacy. These are the tools that help children and adults stay grounded through the ups and downs of life. At Trinityhouse, together with the world earlier this year, we explored the WRAP framework: Wellness, Resilience, Action and Purpose, a simple yet powerful approach to supporting children’s mental well-being. Each pillar plays a role in creating emotional stability and balance, not only for children but also for the families guiding them. Wellness begins with the basics. Adequate sleep, good nutrition, hydration, and rest may sound simple, but they lay the foundation for emotional regulation. A well-rested, nourished child is far more likely to cope effectively with daily stressors. Being mindful of mental health also involves small, practical steps like taking a few deep breaths before a stressful test or stretching during homework breaks. For adults, this might mean pausing for a cup of tea, taking a short walk, or simply naming what you’re feeling in the moment. Labelling emotions (“I feel anxious about this meeting”) helps calm the mind and re-engage rational thinking. Resilience isn’t about “always being strong.” It’s about learning to recover and grow after setbacks. Parents and teachers can nurture resilience by giving children space to express their struggles without judgement, then helping them explore possible solutions. When a child faces disappointment, a poor test result or a conflict with a friend, remind them of times they’ve overcome challenges before. Ask: “What helped you last time?” This reflective process empowers children to see themselves as capable problem-solvers, rather than passive victims of circumstance. Positive mental health requires active engagement, not just awareness. For families, this can mean creating calm, structured environments where children feel safe and heard. The Positive Parenting framework offers five helpful practices to support this: Empathy : Validate your child’s emotions instead of dismissing them. “I can see you’re upset about your toy” goes further than “Don’t cry, it’s not a big deal.” Positive Reinforcement : Celebrate effort and progress, no matter how small. A star chart or extra family time can be simple yet powerful motivators. Consistent Boundaries : Predictable routines and clear consequences make children feel secure. Boundaries should be calm, firm, and fair. Open Communication : Create family moments for honest sharing. Ask, “What was the best part of your day?” and really listen to the answer. Co-regulation : Young children often mirror their parents’ emotions. When you model calmness through deep breathing or gentle reassurance you teach them to regulate their own feelings. A sense of purpose is vital for both adults and children. It gives meaning to our actions and connects us to something larger than ourselves. Encourage children to explore hobbies and interests that bring them joy and fulfilment, whether it’s art, sport, volunteering, or spending time outdoors. These pursuits help build identity, confidence, and belonging. For parents, purpose can come from nurturing both their children’s and their own mental health. The saying “You cannot pour from an empty cup” is particularly true here. When parents take care of themselves, physically, mentally, and emotionally, they model balance and self-respect for their children. Recognising when a child is struggling Even with the best support, children can experience emotional challenges. Warning signs may include withdrawal from friends, sudden changes in sleep or appetite, irritability, or declining motivation. These can indicate stress, anxiety, or burnout. If you notice these signs, open a gentle conversation: “I’ve noticed you haven’t seemed yourself lately. Would you like to talk about it?” Sometimes, simply being heard is the first step toward healing. Continuing the conversation The most inspiring shift in recent years is how openly young people now speak about mental health. Many no longer see anxiety, sadness, or stress as weaknesses but as part of the human experience. This honesty offers hope for a more empathetic, emotionally literate generation. On this World Mental Health Day , let’s extend that conversation beyond schools and into our homes. Let’s practise a WRAP culture together by building Wellness, Resilience, Action and Purpose not only in our children’s lives but in our own. At Trinityhouse , we believe education extends beyond academics, it’s about nurturing the heart and mind. By fostering open dialogue, emotional awareness, and resilience, we aim to create an environment where every child feels seen, supported, and empowered to thrive. When families make mental health a daily priority, we don’t just raise stronger children, we raise a kinder, calmer and more connected generation.

Helping your child make smart subject choices: a guide for South African parents

September 10, 2025

One of the most significant academic decisions your child will make in their school career is which subjects to select. For many South African families, it can feel like a daunting task filled with pressure, uncertainty, and long-term consequences. But with the right support, tools, and guidance, parents can help their children make well-informed decisions that set them up for future success, both academically and professionally. The foundation of good subject choices lies in understanding your child’s academic ability and current performance. Subjects like Mathematics, Physical Sciences, and Accounting require solid results in Grade 9 and a strong grasp of key concepts. Similarly, subjects like Engineering Graphics & Design (EGD) or Visual Arts cater to students with practical and creative aptitudes. Consider your child’s learning style: do they prefer theory, or do they thrive with hands-on learning? Although, it is normal to want what’s best for your child’s future, you should not force them to live up to your ideal of success. Rather initiate conversations about possible careers or areas of interest and explore how different subjects align with those pathways. Platforms like YENZA Careers are incredibly helpful in this regard. YENZA uses psychometric assessments to offer realistic subject recommendations based on your child’s strengths, interests, and potential career matches, and it gives parents access to the results too. “Choosing the right subjects is a balance of academic ability, interest, and long-term thinking,” says Sumari Purdon , Head of Academics for Trinityhouse Schools. “We encourage families to use this opportunity to start meaningful conversations about the future, with support from tools like YENZA and input from educators who know the student well.”